I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Randomize
