Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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