I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
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Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
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