he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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