i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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