Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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