it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Randomize