Your tits are I can't wait for
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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