remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
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