Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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