I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Randomize
