STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
We talked him into tasing himself.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line