We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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