I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize