last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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