Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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