Will you blow on my dice?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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