Princesses don't give blow jobs
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
