Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
