my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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