how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?