i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
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I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
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He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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