think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
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