Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
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