i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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