No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
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it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much