Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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