Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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