I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
