Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
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