You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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