Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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