YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
