I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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