Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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