so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
