Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
