To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
