after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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