Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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