the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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