she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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