ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
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