gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize