why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
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