Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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