Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
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