I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
