Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize