you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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